Frankly Speaking Blog
No one exists and succeeds in isolation. It is contrary to human nature. In fact isolation is a form of punishment, hence imprisonment is quite a part of our human system to address misconduct and vile behaviours in our society. Isolation is not good for humans, to destroy any man's confidence, guts and gusto, isolate him.
It is tough to have any reason and motivation for living when you're all alone in this world. It is repugnant to our human nature.
That is why it is natural and essential for us to exist in family and societal formats. To have villages, communities, states, countries and nations. We are wired to do things together as mankind.
Critical as this is to mankind, it can be very demanding, stressful and at times destructive relating with other humans. Human beings are the most difficult creatures to deal with on earth.
Their intelligence, power and ability to choose makes it pretty tough dealing and relating easily with people. Hence as important as it is to relate with other humans, you must employ the needed wisdom, intelligence and tact required for successful and fruitful interactions.
Anything that can be improved carries within it the capacity to be better. The word better is a comparative of the word good and its superlative is the word best.
This simply means if today you believe there is a need to improve your circumstances you are concurring with the fact that your life can be better. How do you know this? it's simply because from all you see around and all you know, it's obvious people are experiencing life circumstances better than yours even in this economic downturn.
It is difficult or rare to desire strongly something you've never seen, heard or experienced before. We usually are desirous of something we know exist and we can for a fact apprehend. Meaning if today, you want a better life circumstance for yourself, you have at least an idea of how you want your next circumstance to be. You have a clue on where next you want to be in life and the progress or upgrade you desire to make.
As we wake up daily, we see people, things, possessions, places and observe a lifestyle we are yet to attain in life.
We see houses we can't afford yet, cars we can't afford yet, clothes we can't afford yet, hotels, restaurants, lounges and very impressive relaxation and leisure points we can't afford to visit yet.
The reason many of us are frustrated and perplexed in life today is because we could be lost in life. We are just alive we are not truly living. We are not deliberate in our actions and we are not in charge of our life situations. We are constantly being tossed by situations, challenges and the desperation for basic and social needs. Our needs not our purpose have become the bases for actions and reactions. Hence we wake up daily, living a life of reaction to the need to feed, clothe, live in a comfortable home, educate our children, have enough money and be socially accepted.
The 'whys' of our daily choices are basically in reaction to all that is happening around us. We are not happening to anything, we are just reacting to everything. A person who takes up employment so as to meet the needs in life and pay bills and be socially relevant can hardly achieve anything Phenomenal. For most, the ability to survive is their goal in life. This in my opinion shouldn't be a goal as you will still die eventually, we all shall one day, so why make survival a goal?
A life of purpose is such that is meant to make a mark; a life that builds, a life that develops, a life that creates, a life with meaning and relevance in this world and to humanity at large. A life with transgenerational impact.
Dear friend, what is your life about, where is your destination, what is your goal in life? What exactly makes you different from every regular person? Hmm
Fear is a feeling and an experience that is fully rooted in the future. Without the future, fear cannot exist. Every form of fear is based on an expectation or anticipation of something negative. Every fear is of the future. You're afraid of a painful possibility, a negative development or a repeat of a bad experience.
Every form of fear is based on what you think may happen or could happen, not what has already happened. There is no fear of the past, no, the past is the root and source of regrets, regret belongs and is rooted in your past; fear comes and is rooted in your future.
Our reaction to fear however, as mankind is choices and decision. To address what you fear in the future, you make a choice and decision in the present, to mitigate, nullify or neutralise a possible negative or unpleasant future occurrence or situation.
I believe everyone is afraid of poverty. We hate to be broke, we hate the lack, embarrassment, disdain, disrespect and oppression that comes with poverty. No one appreciates a situation where money is the only answer and sadly, money is not available.
Consequently, money has become the control key for human effort in productivity and labour. If there's no monetary reward tied to employment, many people will not work.
I want you to this morning take a second look at your life. Are you living the life you want or a life dedicated to earning? Is your daily activities and choices inspired, motivated and informed by the need to earn, or you're living a life you truly enjoy? Do you see a life dedicated to earning as the only kind of lifestyle; hence, you've decided to embrace it and call it life itself? If you have everything you want and everything you need in abundance will your lifestyle today still be your kind of life style?
Think with me this morning and lets go way back to when you were a child, your days in primary school, secondary school, university it was all about working hard to earn good grades and subsequently get a good job and ultimately earn good income. Even in career, it's been all about working hard daily to earn good income and keep growing your income so as to obtain all you need in life.
Please tell me, is this really the essence and purpose of being alive? Are we just here to keep working all our lives to earn and gather so many things and so much that we shall eventually leave behind whether we like it or not? I do not think so, I believe our lives should be much more than a dedication to earning; there must be more.
The world is full of opportunities and the major mitigation of opportunities is competition. If there is nothing and no one who can seize your opportunity you can never lose it. Opportunities don’t just disappear someone else takes it up. Someone faster, better, more fortunate, better position or better prepared.
Business opportunities, promotion opportunities, job opportunities, relationship, contacts, networking opportunities come up every day and every day, someone takes it up.
As much as we have these opportunities revealed, they are still insufficient compared to the number of people waiting to seize them. There is scarcity of opportunities and only the best prepared and best positioned can seize.
Come to think of it every time you lose an opportunity, your start-off time is further delayed. For example if someone gets promoted in your stead this year, you’ll have to wait for another opportunity maybe another year or two, meanwhile time will not wait for you or wait with you for the next opportunity; time waits for no one.
Many of us today are living very confused lives. We live a life without purpose, vision, clarity or direction. We live a life of distraction, inconsistencies, complexities and frustration.
We are keen on making good success of our lives, but absolutely disorganised and chaotic in our approach to success.
After struggling mentally and psychologically to find answers and we can't, we let go of all the lofty dreams and high expectations and eventually settle for what we already have.
I'm sure left to many of us, we would want better houses, better cars, better clothing, better lifestyles and more money, if we know exactly how to acquire all these, we would indeed give it a shot, but we do not know how to go about acquiring all these without risking what we already have, hence we are scared
Many aren't making effort or venturing into greater endeavours due to uncertainties. They are not sure if their great plans would work or fail, they focus more on the realities of failure rather than the possibility and glory of success and they'd rather remain as they are than risk all they have.
It's a common and popular prayer, at all times at various occasions, especially during birthdays, the prayer is always about long life and prosperity. I wish you long life and prosperity.
A long life is something we desire, cherish and appreciate. We all want to live long and fulfil the number of our days. We want to see our children's children, no one wants to die prematurely; long life is a blessing everyone prays for.
As much as we pray for long life and know it can only be handed and permitted by our creator, in my opinion, many hardly show any true appreciation for each day with the consciousness of it being a blessing or a privilege.
Many do not treat each day as a gift, we sleep; we wake up and just go about our daily activities as though we made the day happen.
We are daily overwhelmed by the various activities we have lined up for each day and we just keep going; all with the aim of securing, preserving and enjoying all we have even as we try to accumulate more.
I saw this movie about a man who had faced many challenges in life. An African American who was determined to succeed back in the days when racial discrimination was very popular and rife in America. He had very few privileges growing up, his father died quite early and his mum was a domestic servant in a white man's house. He saw how well the white masters children lived and this inspired him to do all he could to live a good life as well despite all odds.
With minimal education and few opportunities he worked very hard at odd jobs. He worked at a mining site, a construction site, as a cleaner at a gas station and a janitor at a mega size office complex. His dream was to raise enough money to open a barbing salon and make it the best and most outstanding in their Negro neighbourhood. He believed with hard work and dedication, he would have many branches of the salon and live the rest of his life in comfort and give his family the best he dreamt of.
Sadly, this was not to be as one horrible night, there was an attack on their neighbourhood by fellow black folks who were notorious gangsters. They burnt down his house and everything he had including all the money he had saved.
Being right is very important to your present and future success as an individual, do you do the right things or the easier stuff? Let's talk about that this morning; that way that seems right.
A truth that some of us Nigerians are disregarding today is that our current pressures and challenges as a nation is not a cause, but a consequence of many years of mistakes, mismanagement, wrong choices, irresponsibility and bad behaviours.
Today, we are paying the price of not doing things the right way and seeking purely after pleasure and easier ways out, not disciplined and proper ways of doing things.
In this life, no matter how prolonged a season of wrong doing, one day we shall be confronted with the consequences of our choices.
Collectively and as individuals, many of us are paying the price of the past and we are actually not victims of the current as many people insinuate.
One development I'm so pleased with though is the alertness of the electorate, Nigerians have woken up suddenly and they are beginning to question and interrogate the activities and policies of the elected, it's a sign of growing democracy.
Typical of a session of economic hardship and social discomfort brought about by the need to change or grow will be many affected people exhibiting their various grievances, discomfort and frustration in many and varying ways.
I was at an event recently and within the hall, from a short distance from where I sat, I observed a group of gentlemen discuss the prevailing economic situation and how difficult things have suddenly become.
They kept highlighting the problems and implications, the perceived errors and inefficiencies and the impact of the change drive and agenda on organisations and individuals. One of them suddenly said something about opportunities. He said to the rest, despite all the seeming gloom and downturn, there are still opportunities everywhere for people to progress, accomplish goals and make money.
The rest of the guys looked at him funny as though he was talking nonsense. What opportunities are you talking about one of them growled at him? Where are the opportunities? He repeated. I beg, I beg get real, all this by faith, by faith things don't work for me. As far as I'm concerned, there are no opportunities anywhere now. That's why we need this government to create the opportunities so that we can take advantage of the opportunities created and make money, he submitted a bit irritated.
Of all the nations in the world, why did your maker choose to make you a Nigerian? What do you think he had in mind when He decided that you should be a Nigerian? Let's talk on that this morning, I've titled this one The best and the rest.
There is a Yoruba adage that says a river that forgets its source will consequently dry up. Dear friend, where are you from? Now I don't mean your native land, your village or town or part of the country, no, that is your entry point, what I mean is how often do you think about your source as a human being? As a complete, complex, reasonable creature, do you ever consider where you're from?
How much thought do you give to where you come from as a human being? Have you given time to really study life and uncover evidence and proof of your source and who created you?
I'm glad that as a nation, we are believers in God as the creator of all things and all men. And I believe many of you listening to me this morning believe in God and acknowledge Him as the source of all things on earth.
You agree by the things which are seen and the very complex balance of life and the logical interaction and inter-dependence of all things living and non-living, the earth did not come to be by accident. It's too precise, too structured, too organised, too self-regenerating and balanced to be a product of chaos or sudden explosion. God made the earth, God made all things including you.
Apparently many of us are not very excited about our condition as a nation right now. We are facing very challenging times in our socioeconomic life. Rising cost of goods and services, destruction and threat to life and national assets, conflicts and tension along ethnic and tribal divides, job and social insecurity, fear, anxiety and uncertainty.
I imagine you waking up daily worried and wondering how you will cope with the economic crisis especially. How much do you earn, how much can it buy, what else can you do, how on earth will you cope?
Cost of foodstuff, cost of transportation, cost of essential commodities, cost of clothing, electricity, fuel, rent, school fees; even social interaction. Things appear very difficult on all fronts and you can't just seem to think of ways out.
Everywhere you turn, everywhere you go; the gist is the same. Things appear difficult for everyone. No one appears to have any extra money to spare or lend or give to you. The pages of the papers, the television, the radio all reports similar. Things are getting tighter, times are rougher, everyone appears to be going through right now and to many, it's difficult to see the light at the end of the tunnel.
One of the listeners to this talk show called me after one of the episodes I ran in the course of the week. He wasn't very happy with me. In his opinion I was being unrealistic with the situations on ground in Nigeria. He couldn't relate with my advocacy that Nigerians should be committed to building and sustaining a great nation with a system that works efficiently. As usual he placed the blame squarely on the shoulders of the government. He began to list out all the things that are not in place; lack of basic infrastructure, declining economic fortunes, rising cost of goods and services, growing unemployment, lack of power supply, wide spread insecurity and the likes.
He became quite emotional and he said to me, Muyiwa I am paid just 30000 naira a month as salary. I have four children, my office is very far from my home because I choose to live where I can conveniently pay my rent.
With the current cost of petrol, it's practically impossible for me to survive these days, he said. How do I go to the office every day and return when it will now cost almost half of my 30,000 naira to transport? How will I eat lunch during break at the office out of the 30 000 naira every day? How do I feed my family out of the 30,000 naira, how do I clothe my family, pay rent, pay school fees, take care of my parents and even pay medical bills out of just 30,000 naira?
If I have more than this one opportunity at life, if it's possible to return to this earth and re-live my life, if it's possible to have more than one chance at life, perhaps it will be okay to experiment with this one life I've got right now. Maybe it will be okay to toy and play with time, opportunities and possibilities.
But since there is no realistic, factual or proven evidence of another opportunity to re-live this life on earth, It is just wisdom for me to look at this one life I've got, value it, appreciate it and make the best use of it no matter how long or short it is.
It is wisdom for me to exit this world with gladness in my heart, peace in my mind, and joy that I didn't hold anything back but gave this life my best shot.
It is also wise to be fulfilled, happy and have no regrets what so ever at the end of my days. That is why it is very important I allow no one deny me this privileged of a happy and fulfilled life.
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