I don't know about you but I'd rather breakdance barefoot on broken glass than be rejected by the only person I want and desire. And yeah, I'm serious. The pain of losing the one you desire, the shame of being rejected, the self-doubt that sets in when you've been denied, they all teach you how emotional pain can feel far worse than physical pain. And I'm not speaking metaphorically. I would gladly do bloody backspins before suffering heartbreak.
Recently, a woman I'd fallen for, she told me we have no future together. Ours was a long distance relationship- an affectionate friendship. And when I say long distance, there's an ocean and a continent between us. I'm such a naïve romantic I thought we could overcome such distance. We had the internet to help us. I believed love conquers all. But I learned it can't conquer the doubts of the one you love.
It was the birthday of the twins, it was more colourful than I had anticipated. I didn't have much money and I wasn't willing to stretch my finances for the celebration. Surprisingly, Taiwo, my wife had pre-empted this and was ready to spend if I wouldn't. She invited so many people; the adults almost outnumbered the children. Food, drinks, toys, face painting, music, games all you can imagine would make a children's party exciting and fun was available. The twins were excited; very happy, they danced, took so many pictures, ran around with their friends and it was just a blast.
The neighbours were all present too, even my landlady attended. Her local relative Tawa,
Everyone is becoming independent, self-motivated and goal-oriented. And you got to be careful not to be left behind.
I’ve been having very long days. It literally feels like every day is more than 24 hours; so much to deal with so much to contend with. A new blue chip firm appeared on the radar and it’s been all hands on deck, trying to win the pitch for the account.
"High-pressure" became the term that seems to describe my work environment accurately. It can be taken as positive or negative by each person who reads it. Work wise, I’m currently battling with the enormity of my responsibilities.
So why do some men cheat in relationships' almost all men know that cheating is wrong, yet many still do it.Men will blame their reasons for cheating on their genes and their necessity to reproduce. However, aren't we supposed to be further evolved than a chimp' Shouldn't we be able to control our bodies through our minds and conscious decisions', apparently not always.
Here are the top reasons why married men cheat
1. Because they had the option. The old saying 'men are only as faithful as their options' can sometimes ring true. Men don't get offered sex as often as women so when the opportunity does arise, it can be very difficult for them to turn it down.
Below are four reasons some married women cheat. Keep in mind that the reason behind the cheating is not as important as the cheating itself. Don't allow yourself to make excuses for bad behaviour!
The Low Self-Esteem Wife:
Some women become nothing more than a mother, housekeeper and wife who keeps the family running smoothly. Maybe she is feeling frumpy and unattractive. Her self-esteem is in the gutter…she no longer feels sexy, beautiful or desirable. She is married to a man who takes her and the marriage for granted.
Enter into the picture a man who compliments her, shows interest in her emotionally, tells her she is beautiful.
1.First and foremost, love each other. Realize how lucky you are to be in love with someone who loves you. Say, “I love you” often and in different ways. Surprise each other with gifts of praise to show your love. Remember that love grows in an atmosphere of freedom and trust, not from restraint and obligation. Do things to keep your love and romance new and alive. Don't take love for granted, ever. It's such a blessing.
2. Listen objectively to each other, as you would to a friend. Acceptance is a key to understanding and a buffer for tension and resentment.
So, it's Friday night and I'm out with my girls, at Be Natural Spa, somewhere in Ikeja. Before we got here, we kept deliberating for several minutes trying to make a choice between storming a night club with all the noise and loud music and we screaming at the top of our voices to talk to one another, or letting off steam in a quiet, serene environment having a massage, facials, mani-Pedi while sipping on a Virgin Mojito. Eventually, we chose the spa.
I idly swirl my drink as I listen to the music of Beyoncé's drunken love playing from the sound system positioned somewhere in the building.
It had been a hectic week, with a new GM joining the organisation and as usual, he wanted to prove he's worth his fat pay.
Sometimes I wonder why we always try to over impress during our initial days or weeks of employment. We subsequently loose the zeal and passion few months afterwards. Aisha has a word she uses to describe such action, “Show thy self”.
Dear diary, Taiwo is still not talking to me. She’s mad at me simply because I was upset about her, continuing a gist with the neighbour when I arrived from the office last night and she didn’t pause or stop to come in and welcome me and even serve my meal.
Taiwo is my wife, the house-help is not my wife, it’s in her place to welcome me and serve my meal, not the house-help. I married her, not the house help. These were the issues I raised with her after she came upstairs last night. Instead of remorse and apologies, she got upset saying I’m transferring aggression. She said I was pouring my frustration on her. She said I was creating unnecessary tension. I couldn’t believe my ears. Was I wrong, complaining about her not showing love, concern and affection to her husband who’s had a long and frustrating day? She’s not said a word to me since last night.
I was still wondering and thinking about this at around 4pm today at the office when Chike stepped into my office with one of the most beautiful girls I’ve ever seen in my life! Chike had this mischievous grin on his face and I knew exactly what he was up to.
Hardworking, a great cook, loving, caring, neat, loves children can take very good care of the home, has respect for in-laws and kind to everyone; a full time house wife, prudent with cash, very religious, committed to you and your vision. But, a semi illiterate (secondary school) not so good looking, a bit on the big side and can't express herself well in English, but very respectful, loving and will serve you to pieces.
Hardworking, focused, a career woman, a director in an oil company, tall, elegant beautiful, a power dresser, very educated, excellent command of English, speaks French and Spanish fluently and Rich.
Option 1. Tall dark handsome, rich, upwardly mobile; three brand new cars, caring, loving, sensitive, passionate, respectful and responsible. Owns his own companies, also owns a property in a choice part of town, God fearing. But, has a set of twins; a boy and a girl form an illicit affair when he was a teenager. They're 15 years old. He is still single, ready for marriage and he loves you to pieces.
Too many people today are not happy in their marriages. Many are displeased and frustrated. The ladies feel oppressed and abused, the men feel disappointed and misused. Many marital dreams and hopes appear dashed and so many couples today, although married, are living single.
What seem to be the problem? In my opinion, I think the challenge lies with ending up with a partner that is not suitable for you. Many today when thinking of marriage; an extremely critical part of life, prioritise love over suitability. Facing facts, feelings do fade and feelings can change when a partner eventually becomes totally different from the person you want or thought you knew and married.
Diary, today was just not it for me. After 10 years of employment, hard work, dedication, award after award, accolade after accolade at the Agency, a young novice has the audacity to question my decision on billing a client simply because her father owns the Advertising Agency!
I was already in employment at the agency when this girl was in JSS 3. Simply because her father owns the Agency, she graduates and in two years she’s everyone’s “oga”! Lord help us o!
This Anita girl that I used to help with her project while still studying at the university today, chose to embarrass me in the midst of everyone - talking at me with so much disrespect and insolence before everyone, even my subordinates! Am an accounts Director for goodness sake.
What a day. It rained all night till morning, imagine the struggle to get up at 5am as usual on a wet Monday morning. Arrrgh. It wasn't easy, but I had to. There was no light; had to go out in the drizzle to the gen house to switch on my generator. Taiwo was still asleep. She's been sleeping deep these days, I don't understand o. And I also noticed she's been adding some weight around her middle. If I tell her, she'd freak out, with all the herbal diet plans she's on. But I must admit, she's still very beautiful, in fact prettier with the added weight than when I married her five years ago. She used to be very skinny.
Her employment with the state ministry of environment is the best thing to happen to her after she had out twins Tony and Tonia, The bank job she had before then was just too intense for her to handle with the twins.
The best chef, your favourite dish, served in your best china, lovely dining set, world class restaurant, great ambience, cool music, candle lights, scented candles. Then best dinner ever. You want to start the meal, you prayed and blessed the food. Then you dip the fork in the delicious looking meal, you put it in your mouth and suddenly you’re shocked!